Cruel and Unusual Punishment

The original source for this story was the Daily Gazette for Middlesbrough from July 13, 1893.

"A young man and a young woman were contesting possession of a piece of property, the one claiming under an old lease, and the other claiming under an old will.

"'It strikes me,' said the justice, 'that there is a pleasant and easy way to terminate this law suit. The plaintiff seems to be a very respectable young man, and this is a very nice young woman. They can get married and live upon the farm. If they go on with the law proceedings, the property will be frittered away among the lawyers, who, I am sure, are not ungallant enough to wish this marriage should not take place.'

"The lady blushed and the young man stammered that they 'liked each other a little bit,' so a verdict was rendered for the plaintiff on the condition of his promise to marry the defendant within two months – a stay of execution being put to the verdict till the marriage ceremony should be completed."

Guys. This is how the 1989 movie The War of the Roses starts. The moral of the story is: don't force people into co-habitating just because they both really, really want a house. Make a damn decision, or they'll end up both be killed by a falling chandelier.

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One Response to Cruel and Unusual Punishment

  1. Pingback: BizarreVictoria: Celebrating 3 Years | BizarreVictoria

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