Bizarre Victoria: Celebrating One Year

Ladies and Gentlemen, BizarreVictoria has been active, and done a post every single day, for an entire year. *celebratory vuvuzelas* In this year, I have had 50,000 page hits and gotten almost 300 followers on Twitter. Not bad, considering this Luddite barely knew what Twitter was twelve months ago.

This blog started out as a pure lark, a place where I could report on some of the weirdness I found during my PhD. But it quickly turned into a lot more. This blog provided me with an outlet to talk about the things I am interested in without having to analyze everything academically (and also an outlet for me to drop F-bombs in the middle of discussion, which is decidedly frowned upon in a PhD dissertation). So thank you for letting me swear at you and make dirty jokes and recount odd plots and be an all-around inappropriate person with my career material.

While this has been an amazing experience, it has also been exhausting. It means getting up an hour early every morning so I can research a good story and then type it up. That's why over the last six months I've just been reblogging someone else's weirdness more and more frequently. As I get closer to submitting my PhD, this will no longer be feasible.

Therefore, BizarreVictoria is going from posting seven days per week, to three days per week. I'm going to attempt to post Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays (though this may get moved around a bit as time goes on). This will not only preserve my sanity by still giving me that outlet without tiring me out, but it will also hopefully mean that the quality of the stories gets better, if I have more time to work on each one.

Today I'm going to do a little year-in-review by linking you to some of the more memorable stories I've posted. This year we've seen that:

1.) The Victorians had some weird pets. Like alcoholic chickens. Or the Goats of WAAAR. Or a joyful porpoise that needed to DIE.

2.) Aristocratic people are filthy goddamned bastards. (But not as depraved as penguins)

3.) Never underestimate how far someone will go to pursue his or her hobbies. Like naked fox hunting. Or making bears and lions fight each other. Or pooping out of hot air baloons. Or practicing your ventriloquism at a funeral. Or dressing up like a side of ham. Or getting drunk and painting an entire town that you don't even live in.

3.) Whether he's writing Mysteries of the Court of London, or Wagner the WehrWolf (yes, that's a 'serious' title), G.W.M. Reynolds is a weird fucking guy.

4.) The Marlboroughs get together for all the wrong reasons.

5.) Dueling stories are HILARIOUS stories. People will fight literally anything. Dogs. Balloons. Nuns and monkeys. Bicycles. Or no one at all.

6.) There were a lot of badass women in history. Some of them steal nun corpses for their lesbian lovers. Some smash furniture until you love them. Some fool everyone into thinking they're men for 50 years. Some are grandmothers who just need to stab things. Some drown in the desert. Some fall in love with Mountain Men. Some make friends with cannibals and teach crocodiles good manners. Some just want to kill Native Americans because they're bored. Some just want to marry Native Americans for the same reason. Some had "broken more noses than anyone else in Montana". Some find their husband and child so repugnant that they have to run away with the Aborigines. Some were outrageously cocky Confederate spies. Some will do anything  to be a STAAAAAR. Some write dirty love-letters to their husband's penis.

7.) Nothing is more terrifying than Victorian Unicorn Porn. Except maybe Oscar Wilde's "orgasmic nightmare" play.

8.) There were some really, REALLY good unsolved mysteries. Cue the X-Files theme.

9.) Victorian poets were filth-mongers. X-rated poems for children? Murder/necrophilia?

10.) Why is a Prince Albert named after Prince Albert?

11.) I get a lot of crushes on people who have been dead for a long time. Also, can I have a crush on an entire army? What about on a governmental plan?

12.) The Victorians were obsessed with masturbation and nocturnal emissions. Probably no more than we are, but still. It's funnier when they talk about it.

13.) Anthony Trollope SUCKS.

14.) Weird things happen at sea. Like the War of Jenkin's Ear. Or a shark (a real shark, not a lawyer) winning a court case. Or a man being accidentally drunk for seven weeks straight.

15.) Doctors did messed up things. Like boiling zebras. Or making cows breathe on patients. Or combining sexology with being an amateur electrician. Or becoming "young again" through using cocaine. Or bottling their urine (so I can take pictures of it). Or electocuting people's faces. Or "cupping" people's butts.

16.) Survival of the fittest is a real thing. Just not always when we want it to be.

17.) Empress Sissi was the unluckiest woman in the WORLD, but corsets make you invincible.

18.) Courtesans were soooooooo cooool! They blackmailed the Duke of Wellington! They had severe shopping addictions! They specialized in a sex game called "Milk the Cow"! They had themselves served up on the table naked at formal dinner parties. They were vampires (probably not, but were really creepy anyway)! They mooned the Prince of Wales! They make clients hallucinate that they're "fairy princes"! They put gold in their hoo-haws! They invented underpants!

19.) Oddness happen at zoos. Like a guy requesting to be fed to the lions. Or people requesting to eat the lions. And Jumbo, the Civil Disobedience Elephant.

20.) There were clubs for EVERYTHING! Fat men! Serial killer enthusiasts! Celebrators of random shit and forests! Haters of cars!

21.) I read The Monk so YOU DON'T HAVE TO.

22.) People did freaky things with dead children.

23.) Thomas Hardy had some really dubious morals in his short stories: "Mothers are always right, even when their advice is super creepy"; "Mental abuse is sexy"; "Mothers who give their children up for adoptions should be punished by DEATH"; "Parents can only love one child at a time"; "ALWAYS sleep with your ex-husband"; "If you're going to marry someone, make sure she is a snob AND a skank"; "Your husband can plan as much debauchery he wants, as long as he doesn't fully follow"; "You will be badgered into marriages you don't want because FUCK YOU, YOU'RE A WOMAN"; "Always aim to be someone's second wife"; and finally, "Never turn your back on an Italian".

24.) Early film titles are HILARIOUS.

25.) There's nothing so bad as a poorly done Jane Eyre book cover. Unless it's a poorly done Pride and Prejudice book cover.

There are a lot of links in there, but those are by no means all of the stories. They are merely some of my favorites. I know a lot of fans discovered the blog within the last six months (or even more recently), so there are an awful lot of stories you missed out on. I'm hoping that since the production of posts will slow down by half, this will help keep you all busy for a while.

Thanks again for all of your support. You guys have been really wonderful!

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3 Responses to Bizarre Victoria: Celebrating One Year

  1. Congratulations! I have really loved reading this for the past year and I look forward to all of your posts in the future. Love you!


  2. leia131 says:

    My personal favorites are your recaps of things, so I fully support less frequent, hopefully more substantial posting. And I know that posting about my own life every day, which is not nearly as involved in the research department, is sometimes overwhelming.

    Plus, this will give me time to catch up. I’ve been so lazy at reading stuff lately.


  3. rhuia says:

    Your posts totally make my evenings! Thanks for all the laughs and deep insights into Victorian masturbation. Congrats on the anniversary \0/


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